Sunday, August 23, 2009

The Trying Times of Toddlerhood

Give me a break! Please, sweet Jesus, just HELP me here!!
All weekend long, I have been struggling (yes, struggling to the uttermost definition of the word) with my sweet Luke.

He has attitude! And when I say "attitude", I'm not talking about a calm, precious, peaceful personality. Certainly not the kind Paul talked about when he told us our "...attitude should be that of Christ Jesus," Phil 2:2-4

Luke's attitude of late is one of defiance. stubbornness. ugliness. Anything BUT lovely.
And I, as his mother, have also failed to exhibit the patience the Bible calls me to have.

Why must he press me to the limits? Why does he act like a rebellious teenager when he hasn't even had his fourth birthday? I'm happy for the Amazon buy-with-one-click, because James Dobson's The Strong-Willed Child was purchased earlier today during the midst of a Luke Dalke Meltdown.

I want to be a good mother (as we all do).....and I somehow had this notion that motherhood is all pony-ride birthdays and playground bliss. Until, I heard my own mother's voice come out of my mouth two days ago as we were driving to the grocery store. The aforementioned strong-willed child was doing his thing in the backseat......throwing a fit that should have been filmed and submitted to the actor's guild. It was definitely one for the Oscars.

Anyhow, I pulled to the side of the road and my mother said, "Luke Philip Dalke, I will pull this car over, and I will wear your tail out and it will hurt." Except - it wasn't my was ME. I said it. I did one of those "things" I swore I would never do as a mother.
And there went the dream of being the perfect mom. Out the window with my sanity.

Now I have realized that there is no such thing: No One has attained the crown of "Perfect Mother". And thank goodness! Because then my competitive nature would surely drive me over the edge to beat her record.

Thank God for GRACE. I am now convinced that there is more grace for mothers than there is for everyone else. There just has to be based on the law of physics.....or something like that.....because we NEED it desperately. All moms blow it. Every woman who has given birth to an innocent, lovable infant who has then turned into a toddler has thrown her hands up in exasperation.

And so now, after (1) a dinner where there were burps with no "excuse me's", (2) where there were two legs that kept finding there way out of their chair, and (3) where there was an ugly "I don't have to" attitude - - we are sitting in the living room watching the movie Cars. Both of us have a chance to redeem ourselves, and as I look down at this once again sweet little boy......I know that I wouldn't change him for the world.

And there will be more weekends like can just ask my mom.

Dear Mom,
Wow. You had THREE of us. I'm so sorry.....but I get it now. I promise that I have more love and respect for you than ever. I know you just always wanted to be the perfect mom. And you know what? You did the best you could with what you had to work with!
I love you,
Bookmark and Share


Rachel Olsen said...

Ah, this too shall pass.

Great post.

Praying for you today!

Runner Mom said...

Bless your heart!! I'm with Rachel! It will pass...and pass again...and again!! Just walk away when you need to. Bathrooms are gret hiding places!! You'll do fine!